Leadership in Times of Chaos

We are all saddened and disturbed by yet another mass shooting within the borders of our beloved America. The violence is unfathomable and the seeming lack of emotional intelligence by the perpetrators is repelling. Our hearts, thoughts, and prayers go to the families of those who are suffering from the loss of their dearly beloved.  

As our minds attempt to process the chaos, we are often quick to blame those in leadership. I witness this phenomenon all the time--the Broncos lose, it's Peyton's fault. The bus breaks down--it's the driver's fault. Our kids fail a test--it's the teacher's fault. We have conflict in the office--it's the boss's fault. I clumsily trip and fall on the ice--it's the city's fault for not clearing the sidewalks. Finding someone to peg responsibility on somehow helps us make sense of why bad things happen.

Though leadership does play a vital role in determining the course of our nation, teams, schools, and offices--this knee-jerk reaction of tagging blame on others can keep us from developing our own conflict management skills. During times such as these, it's a good practice to look at our own personal lives and assess how we are managing our own emotions and how we are leading those in our own realm of control. Are we practicing integrity in the office? Are we reacting appropriately when things don't go our way? Are we working to resolve conflict in a healthy manner? Are we actively spending time coaching and mentoring others, building bonds and strengthening our interpersonal skills?

Let's take some time this week to do some self-assessment of our own leadership patterns affecting the peace of our current relationships, both at work and at home. Becoming aware is a good first step in appropriating change toward the better.  Start by asking yourself these questions:

• How am I handling the difficult people in my life?  Am I working to resolve the issues at hand or using avoidance tactics?
• Do I tend to help deflate disagreements or spur them on?
• What is one potential conflict on the horizon in my personal life?  What can I do to bring the issue into the open before it escalates?
• Do I truly understand the perspectives of those with whom I am at odds with? How can I discover what factors are motivating them to come together to a place of better understanding?

"Each and every human being on Earth
has both the responsibility and the privilege
of viewing themselves as Divine beings
with the power to bring about peace."
- James Twyman